Lisa and the terrible, horrible, no good very bad birthday

Today was my birthday. I turned 37. I fully intended to blog about my birthday, cite examples of why I feel so fortunate. Talk about hugging and kissing my kids, ooze about a lovely day with them in the summer sun. Show appreciation for my friends and family who sent me well wishes. You know…. Be sappy.

And don’t misunderstand. I did get many well wishes from friends and family. All of which were highly appreciated.

But then, today happened.

And I have to tell you… I had the day from hell. Starting at 7:30 am, my kids started in on me. They took turns being the “bad guy”. By that, I mean that they took turns being total monsters. They cried, whined, fussed, kicked and tantrumed all day. And while it was never both of them, it was ALWAYS one of them. He napped, but she didn’t. And wow, did she need that nap. When she came downstairs post not napping, she was in quite a mood. The tantrum she threw when I had to go up and wake him up for dinner was spectacular. And as it turns out, I shouldn’t have wasted my time and energy.

5 minutes into our drive for dinner out, my husband and I realized that we were inviting disaster. Our beloved daughter‘s intentions were not consistent with a successful dinner out. And I hate discipline in public. So not my thing. We turned around and drove home. Plan B went into place. The kids ate mac and cheese and we ordered Chinese after they went to bed. With a lot of wine. I would love to lie to you and tell you that I hid my resentment and annoyance. That I didn’t let my daughter see that her behavior was the reason we turned around and drove home, instead of going out to dinner. Oh, but I did. I still can’t decide if I feel guilty about it.

So, after the kids were in bed, I took a deep breath. Probably my first of the day. We ordered Chinese, opened a bottle of wine and sat out on our porch. By the time dinner was done being consumed, the bottle of wine was history and I was a more than a little tipsy. I had refilled my glass more efficiently than my husband. After all, I needed it more.

But I was fine. Breathing easy. Happy again. And this is why.

Because I still have a great relationship with my husband.

When my husband and I first met, fell in love, and got married, we were nuts about each other. We were “that couple”. Yeah, that couple that made people nauseous.  Having kids had its impact, and we started arguing more often, but not often enough that I worried about our relationship. We still managed to talk enough to keep the lines of communication open and maintain the image of impenetrable for the sake of discipline.

 And tonight, as I look back on my day, my birthday, I do feel true appreciation mixed with the unavoidable frustration.  I appreciate that my day ended with the companionship of my best friend.  My husband.

 And the kids will live another day.