Getting braver!

Ok, you are going to laugh at me for this one. Or maybe you won’t. Let’s find out.

My son has been showing signs of being shy recently. This came as a surprise to me, as he was always much more socially aware when the twins were little. When they were really small, he was the one who knew how to alter his cries for varying meanings. I always just KNEW what he needed. She was much of an enigma. Was it her diaper? Did she want to be held? Did she want to be put down? Help!!!

When we went to play areas, mostly indoors, she (who could walk) would cling to my leg and scream. He (who could not walk) would crawl into the biggest group of boys he could find with an expression of glee. I was constantly amazed.

Then, all of a sudden, there was a switch. She finally “got it”. The social bug. She loved to flirt and meeting new friends became exciting. And just about the same time, he got more withdrawn. Ironic.

This didn’t alarm me. My husband was quite shy as a kid and he still maintains elements of being a reserved person. Not to the same level as previously, but the signs are still there.

Which is why it didn’t alarm me. No, I didn’t think it was the start of some deteriorating social disorder. And no, I didn’t think it was the onset of autism. I did, however, hope for him to get past it. I don’t have any judgment of shy people, but some of my friends are shy and I know it feels like a burden to them at times. Given a choice, I would send my son into his future years without that burden.

Which is also why this day was such a pleasure.

We went to a playground/park and go there somewhat early. It was a beautiful day and I didn’t want to waste a minute of it. When we arrived, it was mostly empty, just a few kids. I like arriving to quiet playgrounds, it’s relaxing. The kids can explore and I can still hear the birds and crickets. Very nice.

Over the period of an hour, there were many arrivals, some of whom were significantly older than my munchkins. They didn’t care. Actually, to be more accurate, they did care. They loved it. Big kids… woo hoo!!!! When a batch of kids left and were replaced by another group, they were equally thrilled. More new friends, right? Awesome.

But here was the moment that gave me true joy. Keeping a visual of two kids on a big playground is not easy and at one point I temporarily lost track of my son. (Like, oh, for 10 seconds). When I located him, he was standing with two other little boys. They were looking at each other and giggling. My son was making friends on the other side of the playground, far from the security of mommy. YES!!!!!!

He looked confident, radiant, and so very proud. I almost cried. Really.

My daughter had been doing much of the same. She loves to run up to “new friends”, grin, and giggle and stick out her tongue as a gesture of friendship. It’s pretty cute. And it works. She almost always gets a smile in return. But she has been doing this for months. While it’s wonderful, it’s not novel or new.  And I have gotten used to it.

For my son, this was a new and grand accomplishment. I could not have been prouder.

They are SO ready for pre-school.