There was an earthquake today. Where I live, this is not usual. I live on the East coast after all. Earthquakes? And this was, while not huge, was not exactly small either.
I was downstairs; my kids had been in bed for about 30 minutes for their naps. He was sleeping and he wasn’t. (Basically, the usual) I was on the phone. Then I felt it. The couch moved. Freaked me out. I jumped up and exclaimed “What the hell is that?” My friend felt it a moment later and we both quickly hung up to deal with our respective homes. I ran, no wait… ran isn’t the right word. I BOLTED upstairs.
When I got to my daughter’s room I opened the door and saw her standing in her crib, holding on to the bars. Her eyes were big, brown saucers and she stared at me as if to say “What the hell was that?”. All she could squeak out was “mommy”. I hugged her, looked around. No danger. Nothing was falling. Then I went to check on her brother, who was still snoring butt up in a physically safe room. Go figure.
By the time I got back to her, it had stopped completely. I kissed her, tucked her back in and told her it was time to sleep. When I checked the monitor 5 minutes later, she was fast asleep in the position I left her in. I guess she believed my façade of calm and went on with life.
But I wasn’t calm. In fact, it took me almost an hour to really feel calm again. My heart was beating fast and I was jittery. Our neighbor grew up in California, so she wasn’t fazed. Funny how perspectives can differ.
But it made me think. Hard. About what I appreciate and what I take for granted. Sure, this particular earthquake left little to no damage, considering both property and personal injury. We have no house repairs to make and our son didn’t even know he missed something. Clearly my daughter was not traumatized or she wouldn’t have gone right to sleep. Right? Looking at the news, I didn’t see any big reports of death or dangerous injury. Overall, no harm done. No big deal. Move on. Right? Not really.
I got to thinking about Japan, representing simply one location where the panicked parent running for their child’s room might not have been so lucky. How many parents have run to another room, only to find a child or family member injured or killed? Rubble to clear with no certainty of what was to be found underneath? I can’t even imagine. It makes me want to cry just thinking about it.
This morning, on the way back from our morning activity, my daughter had been driving me crazy and I had yelled at her a little. This particular behavior she was displaying is not a new one and it’s getting old quickly. Not working out of the home this summer, I have had a LOT of time with my kids and I have missed the opportunity to be away long enough to miss them. As a result, sometimes my patience hasn’t always been stellar. Hmmm…. After the panic somewhat subsided, I watched the monitor. Gazed at the peaceful sleeping bodies of my children. What blessings they are. How easy that is to forget sometimes.
I know that I have talked about my kids from many different perspectives. I have complained mildly about their crazy kid behaviors and my lack of time away from them. I have glowed about how nicely they are growing up and how proud I am of them. But I rarely comment on how fortunate I am to have them happy and healthy, plain and simple. And that’s not a good perspective to lose sight of.
My husband was working on the edge of local today and was somewhat hard to reach. He came home to me safely; we had dinner as a family, played and bathed the kids before putting them to bed. How beautifully ordinary. No relocations to shelters. No picking up the pieces of a shaken home. No hospitals. Just a simple evening. We even had some chocolate cake.
I think we all lose sight of that. We complain about the ordinary, the ruts and patterns of our lives. We yearn for an eventful day where something unpredictable happens. And that’s not to say that I will never say that again… but I will think twice before I ask for it at all costs.
Maybe that little earthquake shook some gratitude back into me.
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